If you’re reading this, we’ve been compromised. Clean out my college fund in the Cayman Islands and meet me in Moscow. Don’t worry about me, Dragon-Sword will keep me safe.
And Patrick… there will be consequences if you forget my blankie and pockasauces.
Also, if you have time, leave a note for Mom and Dad. They'll probably worry, the silly, naive scouts. If only they knew my mission... I guess it would help if I told them, but we were sworn to secrecy, Patrick!
Ya know, we might need food for this journey... better just bring them. Uch, parents. They make everything so difficult.
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